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Category Archives: a sense of place

mutual christmas gift: a trip to the montague book mill [photos]

29 Saturday Dec 2012

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in a sense of place

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books, boston, family, holidays, travel

This year, Hanna and I decided that our joint gift for one another was going to be a trip to the Montague Book Mill in Montague, Massachusetts (“books you don’t need in a place you can’t find”).

We set out this morning along MA-2, under snow-grey skies, and about two hours of NPR later arrived at the Mill. It was so lovely to have snow! As Hanna says: “A proper winter!”

We decided right away that this was definitely a bookstore we could fall in love with! All they needed was a woodstove and a bookstore cat or two (too bad they don’t allow people to take up permanent residence…)

(I’m a sucker for exposed beams and wood flooring, what can I say?)

From the second floor, you could hear and see the rushing waters of Millers River outside.

The re-purposed riverside mill building is actually a complex of businesses, including not only the bookshop, but also a cafe, the Lady Killgrew, used record and CD store, and artists’ showroom.

After browsing and selecting our book purchases* we got a delicious lunch at the Killgrew, consisting of peanut-ginger udon salad, a brie and marinated apple panini, maple milk (an “intrinsically delicious” food) and ginger cupcake.

(I seem to like taking photographs over Hanna’s shoulder)

While we were eating, the snow began to fall in beautiful fluffy flakes over the river.

… and on our way back out to the parking area, we stopped at the artists’ shop and bought these beautiful recycled wood inlaid star ornaments for our future Christmas tree. They’re supposed to be “friendship” stars, but we figure they can be for a pair of wives just as well.


*Thanks to my grandparents Ross for the gift money that funded our book buying spree! For those interested, we bought:

Middletown: A Study in Modern American Culture by Robert S. Lynd and Helen Merrell Lynd (Harcourt, 1929).

Public Vows: A History of Marriage and the Nation by Nancy F. Cott (Harvard U.P., 2000)

The Tassajara Recipe Book: Favorites of the Guest Season by Edward Espe Brown (Shambhala Press, 1985)

Albion’s Fatal Tree: Crime and Society in Eighteenth-Century England by Douglas Hay et. al. (Pantheon, 1975)

The Unknown Mayhew by Eileen Yeo and E.P. Thompson (Schocken, 1971)

A Social History of Madness: The World Through the Eyes of the Insane by Roy Porter (Weidenfeld & Nicholson, 1987)

Perfecting the World: The Life and Times of Dr. Thomas Hodgkin, 1798-1866 by Amalie M. Kass and Edward H. Kass (Harcourt, 1988).

one thousand eight hundred and twenty days [2007-2012]

01 Saturday Sep 2012

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in a sense of place

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boston, domesticity, family, professional gigs, simmons

This weekend marks the end of my fifth year in Boston, and it’s become something of a tradition since I began this blog to post some thoughts about where I’m at in my relationship with the city and the grown-up life I’m building for myself here (see previous installments one, two, three, and four).

Five years. Half a decade. While I’m under no illusions that such a period of time makes me a New Englander, it does mean that I’ve lived in Boston for enough years that the geography of the city is populated with personal memory and meaning. Hanna and I are making certain pathways and places our own. And at some point during this year, I realized that I’d stopped asking myself where we might move next in the national sense (San Francisco? Portland, Oregon? Chicago? Vermont?) and instead begun thinking about where our next household might be in terms of Boston neighborhoods. I walk through the city now and think to myself, “Could we live …?” “How far from the grocery store is …?” “Does the bus run …?”

More about that in the months to come, I imagine, since after six years (for Hanna, at least; four for me) in our current apartment we’ve pretty much decided to start looking for a new place in the new year. We’d like a place better set up for an old married couple (rather than two roommates) and kitties, and we’re finally in a stable enough situation financially that we have some flexibility when it comes to paying a little more for extra space or a garden in which our cats can cavort in safety.

But that’s all in the future. (And the 70+ moving vans I’ve counted in our neighborhood this morning are enough to make you want to stay put permanently!) This is a moment for reflecting back on how much change has passed through my life in the previous five years (aka two hundred and sixty weeks, aka one thousand eight hundred and twenty days).

My, it’s been a busy half-decade!

  • House and home. 
    • [2007] I started out my Boston adventure living in a tiny dorm room at Simmons College. While not inadequate (and I appreciated pre-assigned housing as someone moving from out of state), it was only the second experience I’d had living in a dormitory — the other being when I studied abroad in 2003-2004 at the University of Aberdeen. I had not anticipated how moving into a dorm and starting graduate school was going to make me feel immature and trapped, rather than ripe with possibility. It was not the best psychological twofer ever.
    • [2012] Since moving in with Hanna in May of 2008, I’ve been living on the border of Allston and Brookline here in the Boston metro area, roughly three miles from the MHS. We walk to work most mornings and often home again as well, through several of our favorite city neighborhoods. Over the past four years, we’ve shaped and re-shaped our apartment from being a space for two roommates into being a family home — not to mention eeking out space for about 800 books! As I wrote above, we’re slowly making the Boston area our habitat for at least the next five-to-ten years. Which is a much happier, healthier state of mind and place of being than I was right after the move.
  • Relationships and romance.
    • [2007] As I’ve written about extensively in other posts, I came to Boston with a (romantic) relationship history of nil and no friends in the area, other than the few contacts I’d had with Simmons students in preparation for my move (Hanna being one of them!). It was the first major move away from my hometown, away from my established support network of family and friends. And during the first twelve months of my time in Boston I was majorly stressed — as in panic attacks, nausea, and extreme sadness over the geographic distance from loved ones. I wanted and needed, to leave West Michigan — but the transition was not an easy one. 
    • [2012] Since then, obviously, Hanna has happened! In ways that have been fairly extensively documented here (are you all tired of wedding-planning posts yet?). So in five short years I went from being single to nearly-married, and from being non-directionally sexual to being in a lesbian relationship. Both of which have had fairly major effects on how I organize my self-understanding and relational life. In addition, Hanna and I are slowly-yet-steadily building a network of friends near and far: People we go to the movies with, have over for dinner, who kindly watch our cats and pick up the mail when we’re out of town for the weekend. People we blog with, email with, host while on visits from afar. This is a major part of what makes Boston start to feel like home.
  • Learning and schooling.
    • [2007] As most of you know, I moved to Boston for graduate school — like so many other people who relocate here! For most of my five years here, I was enrolled at least part time in the Simmons library science and history program. It had its highlight and lowlights, as chronicled on this blog. I’m super-proud to have completed my Master of Arts in History through documenting the founding and early history of the Oregon Extension program, and my Master’s degree in Library and Information Science opened the door to my current work as a reference librarian, which really was my career objective when I started the program (inasmuch as I had one). So while I found the process psychologically and emotionally exhausting, and perhaps not as intellectually stimulating as I’d hoped, it did position me to move forward outside of the academy as a scholar.
    • [2012] Five years later, I’m no longer in school — and so pleased about that state of affairs. I’ve come to the conclusion over roughly eleven years in formal schooling (1998-2005, 2007-2011) that institutional education is not healthy for me, despite the fact I perform well therein and many of its resources are useful for my intellectual explorations. So I completed my Masters degrees back in January and May of 2011 and have no plans to return. Meanwhile, I am committed to being a working historian as well as a reference librarian: learning, for me, has never been bound by the schooling. So we’ll see where the next five, ten, fifteen years takes me!
  • Work, work, work.
    • [2007] I moved out to Boston with the promise of financial aid and a part-time position at the Barnes & Noble store in Boston’s Prudential Center (an internal transfer from the store where I had been working in Michigan). It became clear almost immediately that the $9/hour they were paying me — while a raise from my hourly wage in Michigan — could not cover Boston expenses. So I began looking for other work, particularly pre-professional library work. I interviewed at a few places with no success before landing a position as a library assistant at this place called the Massachusetts Historical Society, which caught my eye in the job postings because I’d heard my friend Natalie talking about her research there. This October 12th will mark my fifth anniversary as a member of the MHS staff.
    • [2012] I had other jobs as a graduate student, of course (we all juggle multiple things to make ends meet): teaching assistant at Simmons, archives assistant at Northeastern, internships. It was good experience, but the MHS has always been my professional home. As I’ll be writing about more extensively soon, I’ve recently accepted a promotion from Assistant Reference Librarian to Reference Librarian, a position left open when a colleague departed for the wilds of Rhode Island. The folks I work with have been unfailingly supportive in my professional endeavors and I’m looking forward to a part of the team for years to come.
  • Writing of many kinds.
    • [2007] I started this blog in the spring of 2007 to chronicle my graduate school and relocation experiences. As I remarked in an email to a friend recently, I’m a compulsive self-chronicler (an observation that will come as a surprise to no one reading this post). When I’m not blogging I’m journaling or emailing or jotting down notes for future projects. I think better with a pen or pencil in hand; this has been true pretty much since I learned how to write (though I was a bit of a late bloomer in that regard). 
    • [2012] Nine hundred and ninety blog posts later, I’m still writing, writing, writing: blost posts, fan fiction, academic papers, post-academic papers, emails, journal entries — even documentary film scripts! Looking ahead to my sixth year as a Bostonian, I’ll be completing a free-lance documentary film project with my friend Heather, which involves charting a family’s genealogy in video form; I’ll be forging ahead with my research on Nellie Keefe; I’m musing about a collaborative project on sexual fluidity with a couple of friends; I have half a dozen fan fics (Supernatural, Downton Abbey, Upstairs, Downstairs) waiting for completion, and I’ve been enjoying my gig as an occasional blogger at In Our Words. 
Shorter me: I’m becoming (have become?) the Crazy Lesbian Librarian Cat Lady of my dreams! Also, Elizabeth Brown.

grownups by xkcd

I’m looking forward to sharing the next five years — at least! — with all of you right here at the feminist librarian. My internet home.

from the neighborhood: anna & hanna go shopping at ikea…

19 Sunday Aug 2012

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in a sense of place

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Tags

boston, domesticity, family, from the neighborhood, photos

… and accidentally come home with a GIANT BED.

Also a stuffed fox.

We … didn’t mean to purchase a bed that was going to need library stools to ascend into at bedtime. But upon assembling the pieces, we discovered that’s what we’d done!

We started out this morning by picking up a Zip truck and dropping our old full/double bed frame (also from IKEA)  and second-hand foam mattress at Goodwill. Then we drove south of Boston to the local IKEA store. Which, we can report, is always an experience and a half. The relationship drama being played out between parents and children, husbands and wives, wives and wives, husbands and husbands, roommates, etc., is just something else. But! They did have our beloved bed frame in the next size up as well as a variety of mattresses to choose from.

We just somehow failed to realize that between box spring and mattress we were purchasing Mount Moriah.

The cats are slightly confused.

But we have a new bed. That will hopefully help us sleep a bit better and serve us for years to come. By some miracle of physics, Hanna figured out how to get the damn thing — box and mattress — up the narrow stairs to our second floor apartment. It was touch-and-go there for a few minutes at the u-turn of our landing. After we got it up, we agreed fully that next year when we move such heavy lifting will be left to the brawny lads and lasses of the moving company while we sit back and drink tea. If they have difficulty we’ll point out that we did it once, so we know it’s possible to do again!

To celebrate I went down to our neighborhood liquor store and purchased a lovely bottle of ten-year Glengoyne whiskey:

I picked Glengoyne because my father and I have actually been to the distillary, on our walking tour of Scotland in May 2004. Here’s my Dad standing out in front of the main building in his hiking gear:

Anyway … I’m signing off to knock back a glass and watch some Eddie Izzard while we wait for our Indian food to be delivered. Wish us luck as we climb to lofty heights for forty winks tonight!

from the neighborhood: fun with friends, part 2

07 Thursday Jun 2012

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in a sense of place

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art, boston, family, friends, from the neighborhood, photos

After Friday, it rained almost continuously the whole weekend Diana and Collin were here. On Monday, before they left for the airport, we took refuge at the Boston Public Library (between Pavement Coffeehouse and Berkeley Perk Cafe).

center courtyard in the rain, from the 3rd floor gallery
The main branch of the BPL regularly hosts exhibitions, and when we were there they had — among other offerings — a wonderful print exhibition called reThink INK: 25 Years at Mixit Print Studio. Here are some of the photographs I took while we wandered around:
an installation featuring bees
one for the ghoulish sensibilities
I love the gender ambiguity of these figures
and these panels featuring labyrinths

 There were a lot of prints incorporating maps, architectural elements, and text. We also noticed a theme of arctic exploration. The photograph below is of an interactive piece featuring the upturned hull of a boat to which visitors are invited to tie slips of paper articulating wishes and dreams (our favorite: “I dream of Cthulhu” and also “I want a pig.” There were also a wonderfully wide variety of languages represented.

ship of wishes and dreams
in the third floor gallery, there were lots of birds
including these haunting owls
If you’re in the Boston area and are interested in print-making, I encourage you to check it out! The exhibition runs through 31 July 2012 at the Copley Square (main) branch of the Boston Public Library.

from the neighborhood: fun with friends, part 1

05 Tuesday Jun 2012

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in a sense of place

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boston, family, friends, from the neighborhood, photos

We had a lovely weekend with friends Diana and Collin, and were very sorry to see them go yesterday afternoon (if only someone would invent reliable teleportation!). It was, in fact, a lovely weekend despite nearly continuous rain and a trip to the emergency room on Saturday (to verify a strained muscle was, in fact, strained and not something worse — it isn’t, whew). We had lots of coffee and tea and good food, good conversation, and vacation-type movies (Fast Five, and the Doctor Who Christmas special!). I’m letting myself take the rest of the week off from blogging-blogging, but here are a few photographs from our Boston perambulations.

sailboats on Jamaica Pond

Our one nice day (weather-wise) was Friday, and Diana, Collin, and I took a long walk up to Jamaica Plain and had lunch at Centre Street Cafe while Hanna was in Newport, RI, for a meeting.

judgy cat is judgy

All things considered, Geraldine was accepting of the two interlopers — it helped that Auntie Diana brought her favorite dried fish flakes all the way from California! She was very distressed keeping track of four people instead of just two for four whole days and crashed last night (she didn’t even get me up to feed her at 3am!)

I spy with my little eye … 

On Sunday, we took the bus over to Harvard Square to meet up with friends Minerva and Nancy for lunch, and between coffee at Crema Cafe and meeting up with the rest of the gang, we hung out in the Harvard Co-op (where else to spend a rainy morning but in a book shop?!). I was so excited to see Swallows and Amazons on the Staff Recommends shelf — someone raised their kid right!

Steampunk sighting FTW!

… And my favorite sighting of the day goes to this man from Cambridge Historical Tours, who was waiting for a tour group at the Harvard Square T stop and checking his smartphone. He was totally rocking the coat, hat, and goggles.

On Thursday, I’ll post some pictures from our visit to the Boston Public Library’s current exhibition on print-making! Hope y’all are having a good week thus far.

friends in town – on vacation until 6/11

01 Friday Jun 2012

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in a sense of place

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boston, friends, from the neighborhood, outdoors, photos

Our good friend Diana is coming into town today with her paramour, so I’m giving myself permission not to keep up with blog posts and whatnot over the weekend and into next week. Look for a resumption of activities the week of June 11 (can you believe we’re already heading toward mid June??). In the meantime, I give you pictures of flowers!

flowering tree on the Charles River esplanade
a gift from Minerva (photograph by Hanna)

Have a lovely first week of June, and see you back here in ten days.

observations IV

12 Monday Mar 2012

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in a sense of place

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domesticity, family, moral panic, smut, travel, vermont, work-life balance

1) We’re home on the couch with the cat curled up between us. Geraldine was two parts grateful we were back and one part super-pissed we left. My left index finger is bandaged, making typing difficult. On th agenda: trim cat’s claws.

2) New York state goes on forever. The sixteen-hour drive we did yesterday (5am to 9pm) took us from Holland (Mich.) to Brattleboro (Vt.) via I-90. Thank the star whale for audio books and National Public Radio.

2a) One thing I really miss about regular driving is NPR-time. Between couple-time and work in a library I simply don’t listen to the radio as much as I used to, and it’s a delight to have the luxury once in a while.

3) On my observations III post in which I wrote about how comparatively simple the logistics of life back in Holland feel, FluffyCat observed that “anywhere I travel seems less hectic than my regular life does.” Fluffy’s right, of course … there are the responsibilities in daily life I no longer have when I visit my parents. At the same time, I did live in Holland as an adult with a job, a household, other responsibilities. And it still seemed less endless than life here in Boston does. Hanna suspects it’s something to do with the plethora of options (which way/how to travel home from work, where to do the shopping, etc.). Sometimes just deciding can feel overwhelming.

3a) When we drove into Brattleboro (Vt.) yesterday, along Route 9, I thought — as I always do — how much that part of the country reminds me of Southern Oregon and my time at the O.E. I like to imagine part of my instinctive connection with Hanna comes from the fact she went to a college (Marlboro) that sounds so like the Oregon Extension, and is located in a similar geographical setting. I thought how lovely it would be if driving along route nine was arriving home. I like so much of our lives in Boston (our apartment, our work, the walkable city), but nearly five years in part of my soul remains irreconcilable to urban life. Hanna and I remain unsure what to do about that — but any big changes for the future.

4) Having read Hanna Rosin’s opinion piece and this Guardian article about E.L. James’s fan-fiction novel turned published erotica, Fifty Shades of Grey, I feel like I should write something about the reaction to the reaction of this book … if you get what I mean. But I’m kinda overwhelmed by the way the coverage betrays peoples’ preconceptions about fan-created fiction (written poorly, written well), about BDSM (written poorly, written well), about erotica generally, and about women who read erotica specifically that … well. I feel rather tongue-tied. Three things I do know:

a) Rosin’s discussion of the dom/sub relationship suggests she didn’t bother to do any kind of background research in BDSM culture before reviewing a porn novel with BDSM themes … which seems like irresponsible reporting;

b) the origins of this novel in fan-fiction intrigue me; and

c) I’m really really irritated by the implicit suggestion in both pieces that women reading erotica = women unhappy with their actual sex lives, and/or is some new “trend” … hello? When are we going to get over the fact that women are sexual beings who enjoy sexually-explicit material throughout their lives?

5) There are over 100 emails in my Outlook inbox (work email); I am steadfastly ignoring them until 8:45am tomorrow morning, but am really hoping the majority of them are staff circulars that will have become irrelevant or scan-able by the time I’m back on the job. Tomorrow will be a catch-up day for sure. Ah, adult responsibility: I did long for thee.

6) Hanna said to me last night as we were falling asleep at the Super 8, “I think next year we should plan to stay for two weeks, so that we have more time to relax and to see the people we care about.” Which seems like a pretty strong vote for the in-laws to me! I’m so lucky to have a partner who gets along with my family, and likes the place where I grew up (while sharing my dislike for the area’s conservative politics).

6a) Having previously exchanged an engagement cookie (fig) and engagement mustard (cheddar ale), we found ourselves discussing the possibility of engagement tattoos while driving along Route 2 this afternoon. Something symbolic that could then be worked into slightly larger wedding tattoos when we finally get around to eloping (my mother says we should head for Ireland). If anyone out there has working knowledge of Gallifreyan and would be willing to help us work up designs using our initials let me know!

observations III

08 Thursday Mar 2012

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in a sense of place

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Tags

books, family, friends, michigan

1) Went to breakfast at Marie Catrib’s in Grand Rapids this morning with Hanna, my parents, and dear friend Joseph.  Their apple onion tart is to die for (seriously — I’m already hungry for seconds!) and Hanna and I discovered their Turkish coffee. *swoon*

2) At Argo’s used books and Redux Books in East Town, bought Neil Miller’s In Search of Gay America (1989) and Tim and Beverly LaHaye’s The Act of Marriage: The Beauty of Sexual Love (1976). I am taking great pleasure in stacking these one on top of each other. Hanna says she might disown me. I promise my review of the LaHaye will include the mid-70s author photo which totally rocks.

3) While Hanna got a kick-ass black & sparkle manicure (at half the Boston prices!) I read the Miller at lemonjello’s coffee shop and remembered how his Out of the Past: Gay and Lesbian History from 1869 to the Present (1995) was, along with Lillian Faderman’s Surpassing the Love of Men (1985), one of the first books on homosexuality per se I ever purchased or read. I bought them both at Powell’s in Portland (Ore.) on Thanksgiving break in 2001 while I was at the Oregon Extension. Because just that summer Joseph had confided in me he thought he might be gay. Looking back, I’m impressed one of my first impulses was to buy history books!

4) There are ways the logistics of life here feel so much simpler. I don’t mean that in a “rural life is idyllic” way, mostly because it’s not idyllic here — or rural. But in a “running errands doesn’t exhaust me here the way it does in Boston” way. Streets don’t feel crowded and hectic. Sure, the parking can be a bit frustrating, but mostly it’s free and available if you’re willing to walk a block or two. Downtown’s in walking distance. And things are restfully less expensive than in Boston. I know our jobs aren’t here, and some of our favorite book stores, libraries, and indie coffee shops … but I seriously wish there were portkey technology on the horizon, ’cause I feel like my energy level would be so much better if I could live here and work there. I’m just not psychically wired for city life.

5) Off to bake cheddar, beer and mustard pull-apart bread. Food, books, and friendship. At least I can say that our activities on vacation and in non-vacation life are mostly the same, excepting not having to get up for work. And less time spent at the computer, which is restful.

observations II

07 Wednesday Mar 2012

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in a sense of place

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Tags

family, feminism, hope college, michigan

1) Had a lovely evening on the Women’s Studies panel with fellow Hope College graduates Janet Swim (’83), Anne Lucas (’96), and Susan Kioko (’09). It was humbling to hear how other people have gone on to make use of their feminist coursework in fields as diverse as environmentalism, legal aid, and nursing. They filmed the discussion and I’m hoping it will be available online at some point. You’ll see it linked here if it is! I was impressed by the quality of questions from the audience, and the thoughtfulness of all the panelists’ answers.

2) While we’re on the subject … if you haven’t already signed Bridget McCarthy’s petition to the Board of Trustees regarding Hope’s institutional statement on human sexuality, stop on by Change.org and add your voice to the multitude!

3) In a post-presentation haze this morning, everything felt a bit flat — but biscuits, lemon curd and onion relish from The Biscuit restaurant helped! Also pledging to support Miriam’s Radical Doula Guide project at IndieGoGo.

4) Now time for a nap before going out to Grandma’s to watch Desk Set this evening.

observations I

06 Tuesday Mar 2012

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in a sense of place

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family, michigan, travel

1) In my mind’s eye, my home town is seen from the perspective of someone about three feet tall — even though I lived here for 27 years. So when I come back to visit now, the houses all seem wee and the distances so much shorter!

2) The talk I had yesterday on library science was attended about half and half by students interested in librarianship and former professors of mine who want to see what I’m up to. It’s a little fish-in-a-fishbowl feeling, but at least they all kept saying I looked happy and well! It’s humbling to have so many folks proud of me in one room.

3) It stays darker so much longer in the mornings here in Michigan than it does in Boston (damn curvature of the earth!) … I’m typing this at quarter to seven and there’s still only the barest hint of light in the sky.

4) No matter how long the visit, and how little you plan to do by way of social commitments, the time always feels too short and too crowded. Visiting like this is simply not an adequate substitute for living in proximity. I really wish someone would get on developing portkey or TARDIS technology.

5) lemonjello’s has invented a new latte with honey and vanilla which is awesome. And their honey bran muffins are still delicious.

More soon!

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