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Author Archives: Anna Clutterbuck-Cook

a year later, on minden st.

03 Sunday May 2015

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in a sense of place

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boston, family

A year ago, yesterday, Hanna and I picked up the keys to our new apartment. A year ago today, we started packing in preparation for this:

And this:

There’s been a lot of stress for our household over the past year, but I can honestly say that our new home and new neighborhood has, rarely, been the source of it. Our landlord is responsible and responsive — something we particularly appreciate in the midst of crisis! — and the space suits all of us, cats included, miles better than the apartment we’d outgrown in Allston. Given Boston’s real estate market, we know we are genuinely privileged to be able to afford a comfortable apartment within walking distance to work in a neighborhood that’s a good fit for our lives.

As we head into year two of life in Jamaica Plain, we’re digging into our plot at the neighborhood community garden, showing off our favorite neighborhood haunts to out-of-town friends, and working out ways to be (hopefully!) good neighbors. The tensions of gentrification hang over JP as they do all of Boston. In multiple ways, Hanna and I fit the profile of those to whom gentrifying interests cater: We’re white professional queers with a taste for artisan coffee shops, shopping “local,” cycling, and compost. At the same time, we still technically qualify for affordable housing opportunities according to the Boston Redevelopment Authority table. Which simply is what it is, something the majority of thirty-somethings seem to be coming to grips with in one way or another. Privilege is, as always, intersectional and complicated. We’re try to live, and put roots down, in ways that honor both where and who we are.

I’m looking forward to finding out what year two has in store.

On a related note, this will be my eighth summer in Boston. I don’t even know.

thoughts on obergefell v. hodges

28 Tuesday Apr 2015

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in think pieces

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marriage equality, politics, scotus junkie, the personal is political

28ae4-2012-08-2713-38-44Since Windsor, and the death of DOMA, the marriage equality struggle here in the U.S. hasn’t had a lot of direct bearing on our family life. Hanna and I are married in the eyes of the state of Massachusetts and our federal government. It is only when traveling to non-equality states (such as my home state of Michigan) — or when we consider distant possibilities of future relocation — that it really hits home for us that our marriage is still legally more fragile than the marriages of our hetero married friends.

So I admit I’ve been watching the journey of same-sex marriage cases through the state and federal circuit courts attentively but not too closely. I’ve been interested, but with little feeling of personal urgency at this juncture, to see how it all plays out.

But today watching the live-blog of oral arguments and later reading the transcript of the same, it was undeniably energizing to see decades of agitation and strategy (yes, on both sides) demonstrably playing out in the wandering, back-and-forth debate that is an oral argument before the Supreme Court.

There’s already been a bajillion and one pieces of commentary published already, and I’m not going to try and be originally wise on any aspect of this case. Yet reading through the transcript, I was struck by two things I wanted to share. Continue reading →

booknotes: three of hearts

28 Tuesday Apr 2015

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in book reviews

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sexuality, virtual book tours

Welcome to today’s stop on the virtual book tour for Three of Hearts: Erotic Romance for Women, a new collection of short stories edited by Kristina Wright for Cleis Press (2015). As the title and cover art suggest, Three of Hearts is an anthology about threesomes – so let’s talk about the complexity of writing poly porn!

I was invited to participate in the book tour for Three shortly after diving into my own first-ever pass at writing an “OT3” — the fan fiction world equivalent of erotic, romantic threesomes — so I thought, hey! maybe I’ll get some ideas. If only about what not to do — because, to be honest, I struggle to connect with a lot of original (non fanwork) erotica. As it turns out, I have some positive as well as frustrated things to say — so congratulations to the editor and authors on that score!

In terms of Three‘s positives, I was particularly impressed by the relative diversity of situations and perspectives contained within this single collection. Continue reading →

newsflash! you can read my fanfic with no strings attached!

13 Monday Apr 2015

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in fandom

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fanfic

Update: 15 April 2015 15:27:05. The Organization of Transformative Works has just posted an update on the Ebooks Tree situation:

Upon further investigation, it became clear that Ebooks Tree is not hosting MOBI files of AO3 works, but linking directly to the versions hosted on the AO3 servers, and we do not currently believe they are hosting PDF files, either. The AO3 team has taken action to prevent anyone from downloading works if they were following the links provided by Ebooks Tree.

I’d say my advice below stands regarding use of the Ebooks Tree website: Why use their database if you can get a complete series of fanworks in multiple file types directly from AO3 … for free and without creating a user account?

~A.

Original Post 13 April 2015 19:34:14. It came to my attention this afternoon that the website Ebooks Tree (about which there is no “about” page) has been scraping content from Archive of Our Own and posting it in ebook format without the permission of the AO3 authors or the Organization of Transformative Works.

Five of my fanworks have apparently been scraped and added to the Ebooks Tree database. This was done without my knowledge or permission. I will probably end up writing the site and requesting a takedown of my works. [Update: I have sent the first request as of 8:32pm 4/13/15.] In the meantime, I’d like to point out that Ebooks Tree requires you to create a user account in order to access the works they scraped from my AO3 page … but my fanfiction on AO3 is freely accessible to anyone who wishes to read it, whether or not they have an account with AO3.

So, you know, rather than using a shadowy content provider that’s acquiring shit without asking first and then requiring people to create accounts with them to access it, consider visiting the beautiful AO3 interface and reading or downloading my (and others’!) work in a variety of electronic formats: PDF, MOBI, EPUB, HTML.

For ease of access, here are the works that Ebooks Tree has lifted for their content database:

After the Dance
Eureka, Jack/Nathan, Teen

Snogging On the Verge
Downton Abbey, Branson/OMC, Teen

Stolen Moments
Downton Abbey, Sybil/Gwen, Explicit

Sunrise at the Canadian Shack
Eureka, Jack/Nathan, Teen

Under the Harvest Moon
Eureka, Jack/Nathan, Mature

Also, I gotta say … if you’re gonna steal works — dude, at least do some quality checking! All of these pieces are part of larger series, and the harvester ‘bot totally missed some of my more delicious works. So honestly? They should hire better robots.

spring on minden st.

11 Saturday Apr 2015

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in our family

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boston, photos

Spring is creeping up on us here in Boston. This weekend I noticed green shoots from the bulbs in the backyard poking up from beneath last autumn’s leaf mulch. Here’s a brief round-up of what the Clutterbuck-Cooks are up to.

100_4596I bought us a wagon! Our trust granny grocery cart, which was in attendance at our wedding, had lost all tread on its wheels last season and the local bicycle shop staff shook their heads sadly when asked whether replacement wheels could be obtained. So we’ve upgraded to a Radio Flyer all-terrain cargo wagon! Teazle helped me put it together last night.

100_4591We’re taking a quilting class at JP Knit & Stitch (thanks Mom and Dad for the Christmas gift!). We had our second of three weeks’ classes today and came home with the quilt “sandwiches” of top, batting, and backing, all pinned together with basting pins in preparation for next week’s quilting. Hanna’s is at the top, mine is below.

100_4593

100_4592Our teacher, Kate Herron, is a fellow Michigander and history nerd who consults with local historical societies on integrating craft events into their public programming — for example, a knitbombing workshop with kids!

100_4595And finally, today we attended the new gardener’s orientation at the Day St / Roundhill St. Community Garden just around the corner! We’ve secured a good-size plot to tend together and will be ordering seeds this week for veggies, herbs, and some bee-friendly plants. On the list: larkspur, catnip, chamomile, cosmos, dill, rose basil, English peas, heirloom tomatoes, leeks, and fennel. I’m sure pictures will be forthcoming once we’ve had a bit of a cleanup of our plot and begun the work of planting!

Meanwhile, we’re looking forward to Michigan faces over the next few weeks as friends fly out for visits and conferencing.

Enjoy the spring!

my #365feministselfie project

09 Thursday Apr 2015

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in media

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feminism, photos

birthday10On my birthday, I took a photograph of myself with my desktop computer at work.

The following day I took another, and impulsively decided to turn the birthday photograph into the start of a year-long contribution to the #365feministselfie project on Twitter and Facebook.

I’m posting these images to @feministlib and my personal Facebook (where they’re limited to friends due to my privacy settings). I’ll also be periodically adding them to an album on the feminist librarian community page.

turning thirty-four: history without nostalgia

30 Monday Mar 2015

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in life writing

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holidays

Today is my thirty-fourth birthday. I’ve reached a point in a human life where you can start measuring things in decades: ten since I last traveled to…; fifteen years since I wrote….; twenty years since I first read…; twenty-five years ago I first saw… which is the blink of an eye in history-time, but kind of daunting in terms of individual lives.

Except I find that I’m not particularly daunted, looking back over my own lives past. I own them – they don’t feel distant from who I am today in any disorienting sort of way. But they are firmly past.

Earlier this winter I found myself at a function for a friend of mine that took place on the campus where I completed my graduate studies. I rarely return there, these days, and when I do it’s always disorienting — because that landscape belonged to a different chapter of my existence. I find it holds little interest to me know, positive or negative. I am lacking in nostalgia for its contours or content.

I’ve similarly never — never! — returned to our old neighborhood since we left last May. In the weeks leading up to our move I was intensely nostalgic about the place and the experiences we had had there. Since moving, I’ve hardly looked back.

I’ve been mulling over this question of personal nostalgia this season and wondering what place it has in my life. There are many ways I continue to feel deeply connected to the landscapes and experiences of my past; it can sometimes be physically painful, even, to come across reminders of places and people I used to experience daily intimacy with. I will never stop missing, for example, the Michigan landscapes of my childhood. There is a part of me that only awakens when I am on Oregon’s high desert. Cumbria (where I spent the week of my 25th birthday) was a combination of foreign land and familiar that I have never experienced at quite the same pitch in any other locale.

Yet I do find I am at peace with there where and the when I am now: I don’t feel anxious looking back at my own past, nor overly distressed looking forward into the future.

My parents visited us in Boston last week, and we spent several days in a shuttered, off-season Provincetown. On Friday my parents and I walked out along the seashore to Race Point lighthouse, automated since the 1970s, where one may pay to stay for the week in the keeper’s house or the newly renovated whistle shed.

Since I was three years old and first saw Pete’s Dragon I’ve harbored the desire to live in a lighthouse (if you haven’t read Peter Hill’s Stargazing I highly recommend it as a love letter to the near-extinct profession!). In the early months of our relationship, Hanna and I played a fantasy game constructing our future together as lighthouse keeper librarians. Both of us are drawn to the solitude of place which lighthouse locations often provide. Perhaps in our forties, I found myself thinking. Perhaps in our middle age.

Whether or not the lighthouse fantasy per se ever becomes a reality, it seemed a mark of good health to be thinking of all the things that may yet come to be. And also like a mark of good health that, lighthouse or not, I’m interested in what the future will hold. I’m down with what these coming decades will have to offer.

on the #teamharpy update

27 Friday Mar 2015

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in library life

≈ 7 Comments

On Wednesday, I saw on Twitter that the #teamharpy defendants, nina de jesus and Lisa Rabey, have published apologies and retractions for their accusations against Joe Murphy.

Today, Lisa Rabey confirmed that these statements were part of an out-of-court settlement that has ended the lawsuit.

Last September, I wrote a blog post in support of #teamharpy. In that post, I argued:

The charges of sexual harassment aside, Joe Murphy has subsequently demonstrated that he is a man who is willing to bring a lawsuit against two professionally-vulnerable women with limited financial resources who spoke up about behavior they (and many others) see as a systemic social problem.

I re-read this post in light of de jesus and Rabey’s retractions and I stand by my position (made formal by co-signing this open letter) that the situation was not one that should have resulted in an international lawsuit. I am glad that lawsuit is at an end.

I hope that all involved can now move on toward a better chapter in their lives, both personally and professionally. I wish them healing and peace.

I also hope we, as a professional community, can take steps to improve our handling of harassment so as to minimize the dependence on unreliable whisper networks for safety and reduce the chance that people will feel it necessary to sue — or look over their shoulders in fear of being sued.

We are collectively responsible for taking constructive next steps and looking toward a more just and inclusive future.

“come as you are” is finally here!

14 Saturday Mar 2015

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in media

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books, npr, sexuality

[UPDATE: The embed function isn’t working so for now, here is the interview I tried to embed: 7 Sex Education Lessons From Emily Nagoski’s Come As You Are]

Back in 2010 I discovered this quirky blog, Emily Nagoski ::sex nerd::, that that gave me a term, “sex nerd,” for how I approach thinking about and exploring human sexuality. Over the past five years, I’ve had the pleasure of engaging as a commenter on Emily’s blog, discussing human sexuality via email, and serving as a reviewer on early drafts of what is not being published as Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life (Simon and Schuster, 2015).

(Emily, I’m so glad you stuck with this title, as it has been a playful favorite of mine since you first tried it out!)

I haven’t always been a fan of every population-level generalization Emily makes about cis female sexuality — that is, some of her generalizations haven’t rung true with the way I, personally, experience arousal and desire — but hey, that’s what scientists mean when they talk about what is generally for the population under discussion. (See? Because I read ::sex nerd:: back in the day, I can make that distinction now!)

So I’m pleased to see all of the exposure that Emily’s getting, what with her recent op-ed in the New York Times and the extended conversation above, which appeared on the local WBUR show “Radio Boston” last week. I hope if this is the sort of thing that interests you (or you think it will interest a person in your life) you’ll take a look at or listen to what she has to say!

commuting thoughts

20 Friday Feb 2015

Posted by Anna Clutterbuck-Cook in a sense of place

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boston, outdoors

When Hanna and I started shopping around for new neighborhoods, over a year ago, one of our first and highest priorities was that we remain within a 3-mile radius of the Fenway/Kenmore neighborhood where both of us work.

I’ve rarely been as glad as I have been during the past month that we’ve been able (and willing) to deliberately build and maintain a walkable life.

Modified transit map via Transit Maps.

While normally Hanna and I walk to work in the mornings, I typically use some form of public transit — subway, Hubway, or bus — to get home in the evenings. This week, though, I’ve been walking. Between the reduced service, uncertain travel times, and stressed-out fellow commuters, I’ve strapped the YakTrax onto my boots and struggled my way down uncertainly-cleared sidewalks to work and back, roughly a 5-6 mile round trip.

While I have my frustrations with crosswalks with ice dams, fellow pedestrians who won’t take turns down one-way snow canyons, and areas where the sidewalk simply disappears altogether, I’ve mostly been able to count on getting places in the time it takes me to walk there. I know I can leave the house and arrive at work 45 minutes later. And, crosswalks and drifts aside, I can mostly maintain my distance from other human beings — no jockeying for space in airless trolley cars — and enjoy some quiet thinking time along the string of Emerald Necklace parks of the Southwest Corridor path.

Some proponents of walkable urban landscapes maintain that parks are dead space, uninteresting to the eye and inconvenient to the commuter — thus barriers to two-legged traffic. It’s struck me, walking home during these frigid winter evenings, that perhaps urban designers are by-and-large not quiet people, or did not grow up in areas of the country where you learn to pay attention to the changing landscape of wild places.

The snow, this winter, is a wild place.

Local journalist E.J. Graff wrote a column in the New York Times today that has been widely shared on Twitter by New Englanders with whom it resonates: “Boston’s Winter From Hell.” She observes:

In just three weeks, between Jan. 27 and Feb. 15, we have had four epic blizzards — seven feet of precipitation over three weeks — which crushed roofs, burst gutters, destroyed roads and sidewalks, closed schools and businesses, shut down highways, crippled public transit and trapped people in their homes. The infamous Blizzard of 1978 brought around 27 inches of snow and shut down the region for a week. In less than a month, we’ve seen more than three times as much snow. The temperature has hovered between 5 and 25 degrees, so the snow and ice haven’t melted.

…For workers paid by the hour, the impossibility of getting to work means disaster, especially since high housing prices have pushed poor people out of the city to outlying communities like Brockton, Lawrence and beyond. When I commiserated with a checkout clerk at my grocery store yesterday — he’s been missing work when the buses break down or just don’t come — thinly veiled panic showed in his eyes. “People will be losing their houses,” he said.

As tenuous as our ability to afford living in Boston is, Hanna and I nevertheless remain in the city hanging on by our fingertips — and the socioeconomic privilege of being able to do so has rarely been as clear to me as it has been since January 26th, when the first of the major winter storms barreled down upon us.

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"the past is a wild party; check your preconceptions at the door." ~ Emma Donoghue

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